Oh. My. WORD. I seriously love these guys, and I love these pictures!!! Jen is one of my favorite cousins. (Shh. Don't tell.) I've always just loved her, and I was thrilled when she wanted me to take her engagement pictures! And... Justin is ok, too. ;) Haha! No, seriously, though. He's hilarious and so fun to be around!
Around Christmas or so, she posted on my wall telling me that she didn't know when she would get married, have kids, and parties, but that she wanted me to photograph them. It meant so much to me! A couple of months later she got engaged, and still did want me to capture those memories for her! Just love it! Let's get to the good stuff!
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Why I am I so scared?
For my birthday, I got a new camera. The Nikon D7000. I haven't had a whole lot of time to practice with it. Last weekend my friend Eve came over, and I wanted to have a shoot with her. The lighting was rather atrocious. I didn't take the time to get out my reflector. It was cold. Then it was hot. I was tired. Eve was great, I just was disappointed in myself. There are so many things on this new camera that I can't figure out how to do. I'm discouraged. I'm afraid that I won't be able to figure it. I'm afraid I'm a failure as a photographer. I feel like everyone's denying me. I'm not worth what I charge. I'm only 16. I'm not good enough. But. I refuse to give up. I will be persistent. There are some people who do value my work. I'm doing this my way. I refuse to give up. I will practice until I know my camera inside and out like I did my old one. I will be as fun, charming, and fantastic as I can be and win people over with the experience of my photography. I'm all smiles, but I'm real. I'm not letting this obstacle stop me. I may feel like I'm back at the ground floor, but I'm at a whole new better building. I refuse to give up. I will conquer this and be the photographer that I want to be. I refuse to give up. And with that.... I'm going to go practice. |
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May 2019
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